Greenspan frightens Fed with puppet show

(Washington D.C.) In a moment of stunned silence, Alan Greenspan, Chairman of the Federal Reserve, used a puppet named "Mr. Checkers" to inform the American people that interest rates were once again on the rise.

Greenspan reported before the Reserve's Board of Governors that worries of inflation and economic slowdown had forced the Fed to bump up key interest rates by one-quarter of a percent. The federal funds rate is now three percent.

"We don't like that at all, do we Mr. Checkers? No we don't!" Greenspan said while rotating a foam puppet side-to-side. He then proceeded to make the puppet bite a table mounted microphone. "Are you hungry Mr. Checkers? Why are you so hungry?", Greenspan asked repeatedly.

The Board of Governors sat motionless for 13 minutes, until Mr. Greenspan finished his presentation. At which time the Chairman threw the puppet into the air and remarked, "I'm just messing with you guys. Yeah, the interest rate will be going up again."